My Weight Loss Journey

Me Summer of 2018

Today I weighed in at 193lbs and my waist measured 40 inches. I wish I could say that this was my heaviest, but it’s not. 3 years ago I weighted 204lbs I was told by my doctor that thanks to a blood test they found that I was pre diabetic so it was change the way you do things now before it’s too late. So I started planning out menus first a week at a time and now I do it for a month at a time (it makes it a lot easier when it’s time to grocery shop too). I bought an exercise bike off of Facebook Marketplace and started to ride 3 days a week to start and worked my way up to 5 days a week for an hour at a time. I was also doing Zumba and yoga every day of the week. Doing all of this I got down to 190lbs, and then I got stuck. After 6 months of doing all of this and not losing anything I went to the doctor. It had been about a year since my last check up when I was told about being pre diabetic so I was due to go anyway. So my doctor sent me for a mess of blood tests they checked my sugar, thyroid; I don’t even remember what all they checked, but they filled up six of those test tubes with blood. 

A couple weeks later I went back in for the results. They said my blood sugar was still at what they call the pre diabetic area, and that everything else came back perfect and I had no problems. Then they broke the news to me… My weight loss problems might have been due to my hysterectomy.

I had endometriosis and polycystic ovarian syndrome for years before I was able to find a doctor to listen to me and not just write it off as ‘period pain’ or that ‘the pain was all in my head’ or my favorite that ‘I was too young to have these problems so that couldn’t be it’. For years I was in pain daily the only thing that changed was just how bad the pain was going to be that day. So when I finally got my hysterectomy at 33 years old (3 ½ years ago) I was ecstatic and the pain would be gone. I choose not to be given estrogen replacement therapy because I listened to the wrong person. I wish there was more to it, but it’s that simple I listened to someone I thought I could trust.

That brings us back to the doctor’s office and they tell me because I had to get a Radical hysterectomy (which is when the surgeon takes out the uterus and the ligaments that hold it in place. The cervix and both ovaries, fallopian tubes, and nearby lymph nodes were also removed) my body stopped producing estrogen specifically estradiol which is one of the hormones a woman’s body uses to help regulate metabolism and body weight. I was then given the keep up the good work speech and sent on my way.

I knew I would never be 100lbs again like in my senior year of high school, but I would love to get back to the 145lbs I was right after my daughter was born. I left the office that day thinking that I would just have to work harder to get the weight off. A couple days later my friend told me she was drinking 310 shakes and they have been helping her with losing weight so I gave that a try thinking it might help me get over the plateau I was stuck on. Well 1 month later and I was up 10lbs and was back up to 200lbs so I stopped that then and there. I kept up my exercises. So even if I didn’t look any different I was able to walk longer and farther and I could feel a difference.

Now for the past couple months leading up to this point in time whenever my husband would see me doing Zumba he would mock me and do the steps I was doing just overly exaggerated. He said it was to be funny no matter how many times I said mean isn’t funny. He would make fun of me for doing yoga to the point the kids stopped doing it with me because they didn't want him to make fun of them too. I had the exercise bike in the Livingroom so I could ride it in the evenings while we watched TV. That is until he started to tell me to stop because he couldn’t hear anything because it was too loud. So, I started only working out during the day while he was at work. Unfortunately though working out 2 hours a day 5 days a week during my normal work hours didn’t go so well with getting my actual job done during the day so I had to cut back on my exercise routine.

This brings us to the summer of 2018 and when I gave up on everything.

Intro

    Hi, thank you for taking the time to read my little blog/ journal whatever I end up doing with it. I thought I would introduce myself and my family a little bit.
    I'm a mom to my two awesome little gamers. My son Julein is my oldest and right now he is caught up in the fort night craze and replaying Skyrim for the fourth time. When not attached to his PS4 or Xbox one he is a member of a BSA Scout troop and right now has the rank Tenderfoot. He has learned that it takes a lot of work to get merit badges and rise through the ranks of a BSA troop, but his goal is to make Eagle Scout some day and I am very proud of him and stand behind him 100%. He is also super artistic and is in the art club at his school; as well as in advanced Math classes. 
    My second little gamer is Kori she loves all things Roblox and Minecraft and spends hours watching DanTDM on YouTube. She is also a bit of an overachiever; she is part of a local Girl Scout troop and one of the top cookie pushers... I mean sellers. She also belongs to a BSA Cub Scout Pack and is at the Webelo rank and working towards her arrow of light. She is also training for her first 5K through a program at her school called Go Girls Go which she really enjoys and is planning to continue training and running after the program is over. 
    I also have to talk about my hubby who is my best friend and partner in crime. I’m not going to pretend we have a picture perfect marriage; we argue and butt heads like most everyone else, but we always seem to work through our problems whether they are big or small. He works as a maintenance mechanic at a factory close to where we live. It is a very tiring and physically demanding job and most of the time very dirty as well. He's also a giant nerd and spends most of his home time attached to the Xbox one playing Skyrim or Star Wars battlefront. Once upon a time he played D&D and Magic the Gathering, but since we moved to where we live now a few years ago we don’t know that many people here and the ones we do know don’t play. 
    My job is to keep everything running smoothly with my color coded calendar I make sure we are ready for all of the week’s meetings (Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays are booked solid), for camping trips, volunteer work, and every other kind of outing you can think of. FYI if you ever what to hang out during the weekend we’re normally booked up at least 2 months in advance. Plus I have my job as a web search rater for Lionbridge which I get to do from home. You would think if I work from home I have more time to get things done around the house during the day. You would be wrong… While doing house work I think about all of the tasks I could be getting done for work, and while I’m working on tasks I think about everything that needs done around the house; cause ya know when the kids get home from school nothing’s getting done. 
    I decided to try and start blogging again as a way to get a little me time and to reflect on things going on in my life. Like I said earlier we moved a few years ago to a new town two hours away from our closest relatives and all of our friends. Needless to say there is no such thing as a date night cause I'm not letting a stranger watch my kids I don't care how responsible the website says they are. This is also why I found a job that I can work from home so I'm always here if the kids need me. I've had too many awful bosses that didn't understand why I would have call off to stay home if my kids were home from school sick... Well that's a post for another time. 

The Gamer Kids

     I love my kids.  My little gamers or the gamer kids is what I call them because well it's the truth.   Don't get me wrong they play outside too my daughter Kori plays on a soccer team and loves it.  My son Julein plays drums and takes weekly lessons and wants to join the swim team when he gets older.  They both love to play in the backyard or swim in our pool, but really their lives revolve around video games.  Either the Xbox 360, Wii, PC, or on their tablets they love video games when they are not playing video games they watch other people play video games on YouTube.  Their goal in life is to design and develop video games together when they grow up.  Which I think is great for two reasons.
   
     1. Because that was my dream while I grew up playing my NES.  I have made games for on the PC that I drew the artwork and programmed myself that they played and really enjoyed.  I would like to see them follow in my footsteps and go farther than I ever could.

     2. Because that shows how much they mean to each other.  They want to be working on projects together even as adults.  They love spending time together so much that they can't picture their adult lives without the other one there also.

     Don't get me wrong they fight like cats and dogs their brother and sister for heaven's sake they're going to fight.  When ever they do fight it doesn't last very long and 9 times outta 10 it's about something stupid.  They're also pretty young Julein is 10 years old and Kori is 7 years old so they could still change their minds on what they want to do some day.



     However, if they do change their minds it is going to be of their own accord.  Because I believe a person should follow their dream no matter what other people tell them.  My gamer kids are going to face enough negativity and hardship from the rest of the world it is my job to be positive and believe in them.  To make sure they believe in themselves so they have the courage to do whatever it is they want to do.

     On leaving I thought I would share a couple old pictures of the gamer kids.  Above is Kori in my gryffindor snuggie playing Lego Harry Potter.  On the left is Julein playing Star Wars Clone Wars on the laptop while Daddy and sister watched.  This happens a lot even now.

     Now to be completely honest both my husband and I are gamers also.  I guess being a gamer is a hereditary trait now.  That's ok we have fun together and all it takes is a trip to Gamestop and we're set for winter actives.

He Didn't Have To Be...

I wanted to tell everyone about my husband and what an awesome dad he is.  Oops… I mean step-dad not that he is not a great dad to our daughter, but the relationship between him and my son is just amazing. Unless you were around for the very beginning you would not even know he is not my baby boys Biological Father.
When my son was less than a year old I left his Biological Father due to the abuse of both myself and my baby boy.  At this time Kevin was a friend to both me and my now ex-husband and he gave me and my baby a place to stay after the divorce.  One thing lead to another and we fell in love it was not tried and we did not do it to hurt anybody it just happened.  At this same time he fell in love with my young son while his Biological Father was out of the state and not having anything to do with him.  I will never forget the first fight he and I had we were only a couple for three months and he begged me whatever I did please do not take Juju away from him.  That was when I realized just how important my little boy was to this man and how much they needed each other in their lives.

Looking back I think it happened a little at a time I would have Juju in his highchair feeding him supper when he would walk out into the kitchen and take the spoon from me to finish feeding him so I could eat supper.  He would take a diaper out of my hand and go change the baby without being asked he just did whatever he could to help.

It was not long after that when there was a second car seat bought and placed in his Jeep so he could take Juju with him wherever he went be it the grocery store or one of his friends’ house for a play date with their kids.
By the time I was preo with our little girl they were inseparable and he was no longer anything other than Daddy to my little boy who was now 2 and talking up a storm.  I asked him once after our daughter was born if he felt any differently about Juju now that he was able to see what it was like to bond with a child right at birth.  He looked at me with tears in his eyes and said yes (My heart stopped for a minute) then he said I’m jealous I missed this time in his life. So now I just have to make sure that I work extra hard to show him how much I love him.

Well after that answer it was time to get married.

For anyone that brings up nature vs. nurture to me I point out my husband and my son.  Most of the time people that have been around the two of them together do not even know that my husband is not his Biological father.  All they see is a man that loves his little boy very much and right away thinks it has to be his son.  Well… they are right, because in his eyes this is his son.  Just because it is not by blood does not mean he is not Jujus’ Daddy.   He is nothing like his Biological Father (whom he has met a couple times at his Grandparents house) and everything like his Daddy.  They are both huge Star Wars fans and love pretty much all Sci-fi, my husband has taught Juju the fine art of Magic the Gathering, and Pokémon, and Juju hopes to be on the swim team in high school so he can beat his Daddies record.  He is a Daddies boy through and through seriously just forget about Mommy if it’s not Daddy he doesn’t care.

You know what I am ok with that.

Happy Father’s Day Honey!  


Update:

Since this was originally written three years ago many things have changed. The biggest and most important change happened this year is that my husband has finally been able to adopt Juju.
 After years of being in and out of court and his biological father showing up long enough to stop the adoption and then disappear again. This is a huge win for our family and something that both Kevin and Juju have been wanting for a long time. He is still a Daddies boy and thinks that Daddy is the greatest person ever.
We are all excited about the next chapter of our lives together and look forward to see what is in store for us next. I can say one thing for sure though. I married one heck of a good man.

Today is a very important Father's day because it is the first one where he can really say he is Juju's REAL Father. Please help me wish this wonderful man a happy Father's Day.

Love you Honey! Happy Father’s Day!